Treat others how you would like to be treated. And demand that they do the same with you.
When we were children, we were often told to treat others the way that we would like to be treated. Unfortunately, in relationships and friendships, many people don’t demand the same from those whom they interact. They will give loyalty, but constantly forgive infidelity. They will give discretion, but forgive gossiping and backbiting. They will give their time and energy, but forgive neglect and dismissal. How we allow ourselves to be treated by those whom we have a choice in having in our lives says so much more about how we view ourselves that it could ever say about them. You might think you’re allowing this mistreatment or dismissal because you care so much, but in reality, it’s because you are lacking in self-love and self-respect. When self-respect and self-love are high and intact, the idea of tolerating anything less than respect from others is simply inconceivable.
So if you’re feeling frustrated in any sort of relationship dynamic, just ask yourself this one simple question: Could you ever treat them this way? The answer to this question will illuminate so many of the dark corners of an incongruent or unhealthy relationship. Once you have that answer and begin to shed some light, then you can start to work through why you’re still trying to make something that’s clearly failing work.